The quest For life

One should always differentiate between what is merely the part of life and what is entirely, 'the Life'. Our life is unquestionably the part of small or big moments that guide our actions, frame our thoughts and render us reasons and purpose and hence the distinctive mindset. But amidst all this retrospection and introspection we very often become lost. Lost amidst what we actually seek or want, what are the mandatory requirements of our life and what are sheer temporary desires. Well this mightn't be the case with those who got a definite and certain goal and aim and all. I'm talking about we people, about 'us', those who are just beginning to get there; trying to figure out what they actually seek from the life and what they really wanna have and most of all figuring out, that part of their small moments of life  that is pivotal to their life, they wanna keep.
       Life, we all know, is pretty much the consequence of choices we make (whether good or bad); but is it the whole scenario of deciding the kind of life we'll have? I dont think so. What about those moments where we're left with no choice but only one way to go. They are as impacting as the choices we deliberately make and sometimes, those one-way path, becomes the whole journey. And for those who'll say we still got choice in whether or not we go onto the one-way road, are merely trying to console themselves.
       Now the most important part for 'us', is first to decide how exactly we want our lives to be? As for me, sometimes I decide to have one thing but then something else makes me desire the entire contrary and leave me with the decisive time of which of them are merely impulsive and which is a real making I want for my life. For instance, everytime I see the lost love of my life I crave for her, everytime I think of the pain caused by attachments I feel like it's better to be alone, in one instance I want to be known by all and the other instance I feel like being alone once and for all.
      All these doubt and dilemmas might seem feeble to many but 'we' who are facing it know more than anyone, how crucially they influence us in more number of ways one can fathom. We have a whole life to decide about and we're yet stumbling upon indecisiveness of what is merely the part of life and which is the thing that actually is the life.
       Honestly, the quest is still on and the decisions (those that can be made) are yet to be made. Maybe next time I'll have the solution of it, when I'll be out of this one-way path I'm walking onto right now, which is very crucial in deciding my fate, until I decide it myself by either walking along with or against it. Or else something else entirely.

*to be continued*